Why is it that it is always the youngest or the oldest child that seems get blamed for everything? Of course, you have to have a middle child (or children) for that to ring true. Or perhaps you grew up in a family with at least three children? I didn't, but I watch the patterns with my kids and find it fascinating.
When there is a scuffle I notice my tendency to point the finger at Garin first. Partially that is because he is the main pot-stirrer in the family. However, I am also aware of my impartiality toward him because he is the oldest. In my mind, as the oldest, he should know better, do better, and be above getting into it with the other kids. I have no idea how often I wrongly accuse him, but my guess is it is at least thirty percent of the time. My bad.
The kids, on the other hand, tend to point to the finger at Miles when something gets broken or goes missing. That seems to be their default position. The twins seem to be spared of it all, being the middle children. Lucky Ducks!
This weekend, the item in dispute was the universal remote control for the Family Room TV. This is our main TV and the one the kids watch. This remote was lost once before only to be found months later.
The problem this past weekend is that I promised the kids we would watch Hamilton. I was quite excited to watch it myself, because like everyone else, I have been hearing the hype for all these years.
We had a busy weekend with it being the Fourth of July holiday. Finally, on Sunday afternoon I was able to carve out a few hours for us to sit down and watch the movie. We were all excited until we realized the remote was gone. Without a remote, there was no way to watch it. You gotta love technology.
First, we tore apart every inch of the Family Room looking for it, to no avail. We moved furniture, emptied bins, looked under the couch (that is always a frightening experience when you have kids and find toy parts, candy wrappers, and other unseemly surprises). No remote to be found.
After we got done tearing apart that room (which then looked like a scene from a CSI episode), we fanned out around the house to start looking elsewhere. No luck.
All the kids started blaming each other for losing it. They tried to figure out who had last seen it and what day that had been. Graham even suggested we look at camera footage from all the prior days to see if we could find the culprit. CSI: Hidden Hills - The Untimely Disappearance of The Universal Remote Control.
I noticed that everyone seemed to be blaming Miles. That upset me. I kept reminding them that there was absolutely no evidence linking Miles to the disappearance. That fell on deaf ears. The bottom line is that weren't going to be able to watch Hamilton (at least that day) and they were going to make sure that someone took the fall for that.
Poor Miles. He was so distraught. I had to keep propping him up and reminding him that although he may have been the one to lose it, he also may not have been the one. However, because he is the baby in the family, I think the kids surmise that by default, he is absentminded, forgetful and clumsy.
Fast forward to this morning. Garin came into my room to talk to me. He sat down on my bed and out of nowhere, made a strange expression. He said he felt something inside my duvet cover that didn't belong there. Whatever the object, was in the bottom corner hanging off the side of the bed. Yes, it was the remote. We both started laughing.
As I suspected, someone had hidden it there and probably forgotten they had. The older kids often hide the remote from Miles when he is not supposed to be watching TV but tries to be sneaky. I had asked all the kids on Sunday if anyone remembered hiding it from Miles but all said no.
The culprit turned out to Graham. When Garin and I called all of them in to the room to show them where we had discovered it, he had that guilty look on his face and said, "Oh yeah, I hid it there last week so Miles couldn't find it."
Once again, I couldn't resist the opportunity to say "I told you so." I knew someone had hidden it and was pretty sure Miles hadn't lost it. I told all of the kids that they had to give Miles a big hug and a heartfelt apology for wrongfully accusing him of a crime he did not commit.
Miles is too young to understand the I told you so concept, but I have no doubt that is exactly what was going through his little mind this morning as the wrongful accusers lined up to offer their apologies and slices of humble pie.
Garin found the remote in the bottom corner of my duvet cover. I think I too would have forgotten where I hid it if I had chosen such an obscure spot. What were you thinking Graham?
Ta-da!
Hug and apology from Wrongful Accuser #1
Hug and apology from Wrongful Accuser #2
Hug and apology from Wrongful Accuser #3
Dinner: Linguine with Turkey Bolognese.
Warm and Crusty Sourdough Bread on the side.
Our favorite Garden Salad with Pickled Beets and Onions; and Toasted Sliced Almonds.